Apparently, I have been missing since last night. I was a missing person until a couple of hours ago when a police officer, a complex manager, and a maintenance guy banged on my door, prepared to take the door off the hinges if they had to.
Today my mom couldn't get hold of me. She was checking on me because I've been sick unto death with the swine flu and am currently in relapse. Since she couldn't get me on the phone, she spread the word, my whole family panicked, they called the apartment complex management several times, failed to get satisfaction there, talked with my boss at my new job, contacted some kind of Sprint locator service, called the cops, (not just one police agency, but 4, yes, that's correct, 4 different police stations were called. At some point, panic progressed into acceptance, they went through all 5 stages of grief, declared me dead, and planned my funeral.
All this while, I was laying in my bed, sick. I was surprised to learn that I had succumbed, as I had previously thought myself rather healthy and robust, despite the bronchial spasms I've been dealing with.
My first clue that I was missing came when I heard someone banging on my front door. I went to peek out the peep hole and there I saw a manager and a maintenance guy. The manager said something muffled that I couldn't understand and then they gave up and went away. I was glad, because I had called in sick today and was sick in bed. I wasn't dressed and wasn't planning on receiving anyone today. In a little while, I heard more banging so I scrambled for my robe, went to the door, and they were gone already. So I went out the door, looked down the corridor and saw a police car.
"Hrmmmm.." says I... "isn't that strange..."
So I turned on my phone. I turn off my phone when I need to rest without being bothered. I called the complex office and they were very relieved to hear from me, since I was dead and all. They informed me that my mother had been calling and calling and that police had been dispatched and they should be at my door again momentarily.
So they knocked on the door, I answered, they asked me several questions about my mom, my name, and they mentioned one of my co-workers. I told them I have had the flu, I'm in relapse right now, and I called in sick today and went to bed. The cop told me that my family was very upset because they couldn't reach me and they had been sent to make sure I was ok.
Embarrassing. So embarrassing.
I face-palmed... cause.... what else ya gonna do?
So I called my mother and she gave me a largely incoherent tearful rant and somewhere in all that I found out that my boss and my co-workers apparently didn't realize I called in sick today and they didn't know where I was either. So I called them and had a heck of a time getting a live person on the phone. The receptionist kept putting me through to voice mail. I left 2 more messages, and finally got through to human resources. She told me they were all so worried... they called the complex too and sent the manager over. (!!!) I told them I totally called in before hours and left a detailed message for my direct boss. HR said she didn't receive a message, but that this is a glitch with their phone system sometimes. (!!!!) I didn't know this. I told her I was terribly sorry and the next time I have to call in sick, I'll leave multiple messages on different phones and send an email to make double sure someone knows what happened.
So. Very. Embarrassing.
Then I called my sister to let her know and got a largely incoherent tearful rant from her too.
I guess they like me.
I called my mom back, because she was not by any means done ranting when I had to hang up so I could call my job and make nice. Ma told me that they all thought I was dead of different causes. They had me kidnapped, dead of cardiac arrest from a bronchial spasm gone wrong, and in a car accident, laying in a ditch somewhere with my cell phone just out of reach. Ma also told me my dad had emailed Mr. Philly. Fortunately, he must not be home, because I haven't received any frantic phone calls from him yet.
I've had my ass chewed no fewer than 4 times today and from my perspective, it was any ordinary sick day. I felt really bad, I called in sick, I turned off my phone, and I went to bed. As I've done before with no crazy repercussions. I can understand why they would be concerned. I don't mean to make light of it. But sheesh.
I guess it could be worse. There are people who die and rot and no one knows until the neighbors are disturbed by bad smells.
I'm alive! How are you?