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2009-10-20 - 2:36 p.m.


The grim reaper spent the weekend at my place. He kicked his crunchy old shoes off, propped his scythe in the corner, and made himself at home. He ate my food, spoiled my dog, and I think he sold some of my jewelry. Not a very good house guest, overall. He did leave without my immortal soul so I guess it was sort of a win for me.

I am STILL sick. I've been sick for 3 weeks at least, I've missed 3 Mondays due to this illness and each week I thought I was on the mend, went back to work, and relapsed by the weekend. Three ruined weekends of illness. But this one was extra special, because I had a high fever from Friday night till sometime this morning. Yeah, Tuesday. That is a long ass time for an adult to carry a high fever. I'm stoic, generally, and I hate to go to the doctor more than the average bear, but I do have my line where I say F*ck this, I'm seeing a doctor.

Not being able to breathe is exactly where I draw the line. On Friday night I coughed all night long and by 4:00 am Saturday morning I felt like I couldn't get enough oxygen. It felt like my airway was constricted down to approximately the size of a drink box straw. That's scary. I was very nearly helpless and I had Mr. Philly on the phone threatening to call 911 and give my address if I didn't go to the doctor. At this point, I wanted to go, but I had zero energy and no air. It's very hard to get dressed without breathing. I also come from a long line of southern belles, and we DO NOT go out with bad hair and no make-up. That is the unwritten law in my family. You do not present if you are unpresentable.

Well, I presented myself QUITE unpresentably to the local emergency clinic and got promptly chastised for waiting 3 weeks to see a doctor. The doc said I am very fortunate that I don't have pneumonia. He said I have bronchitis. (again. yippee) He prescribed me 2 puffers, albuterol and steroids, Bactrim for bug killing, and some kind of heavy duty cough syrup that should come with a much bigger warning on the label. I was so sore from coughing and so tired of coughing that I didn't want to wait to get home to take some of the cough syrup. So I opened it in the parking lot and took a swig. Holy Lord, it's a good thing I live close to the drug store, because my ass was impaired and unable to even walk within about 20 minutes. I was so out of it. I was so altered, my eyes weren't seeing right. I couldn't do a sweeping look around the room. My vision was like a series of slow still shots. I was high, but it wasn't fun. My fever was climbing, and had already topped 103. I don't know how high it got because all I could do was lay there. It made me realize how alone I am in this town. I didn't have anyone to take me to the clinic or get me medicine. I don't know how I got through it, except by the grace of God. At one point, I was laying on the couch, just neeeeeding my medicine and it was about 8 feet away from me, but it might as well have been 100 miles. I couldn't get up at all. I didn't eat anything solid the whole weekend. I just couldn't stand there and fix food. Not even easy food. I ate a few yogurt cups. heh. With a high fever. I needed someone to take care of me.

Dexter watched me like a hawk and seemed upset a lot of the time. He knew something was wrong. I've never been this sick before. My fever finally broke this morning. I was getting pretty concerned about that because it is not normal to have fever that long. I really don't need to go to work tomorrow either, but I can't take sick time yet because I'm still in my 90 days trial period. I just am off without pay. I can take that, but my new bosses, whom I like, don't know me well enough to know I'm not just an alcoholic who regularly calls in sick on Mondays. I think they suspect something unsavory, because they told me to bring in a doctor note when I come back. I'm not well and this is how I relapsed twice already. I am afraid this may be N1H1 because of my symptoms and that mess is killing folks. So I just don't know. I should stay home for my health and well being, but I should go to work for the health and well being of my job.

Should I go to work tomorrow, or not?

spring - fall

2 This comments thingy doesn't work now because I let my paid membership lapse.

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