GET A LOAD OF THIS CRAZY DREAM I HAD:
I had a lot of wacked out dreams last night, but the one I woke up on was about Andrew. Diaryland Andrew.
I dreamed that it somehow came out that Andrew was none other than Bill Cosby. This was shocking news to everyone, what with us all thinking Andrew is an Englishman and all. But hey.. it was a proven fact in this dream that Andrew was really the Cos.
So I decided to go back and re-read some of Andrew's diary, as I didn't remember it being Cosby-rific in the past.
I was seeing Andrew's entries in a whole new light and thinking "WOW! Why didn't I figure this out on my own??"
And then I was awakened by the phone. But hey. Weird, no? That's what I call a "sudden revelation dream" where something is suddenly exposed in some way that no one ever knew before.
I also have a lot of dreams where I see a danger that no one else sees. A flood is coming and I'm the only person in town trying to prepare for it. There's a giant spider crawling towards someone and they can't see it. Etc. I wonder what these dreams mean. Maybe I am going to discover something I didn't already know or something.
While I'm talking about dreams, let me tell you about my "night terror" that I had when I was about 17 and Myra was about 12. We were living in Germany and sharing a room at the time. I had a horrifying nightmare in which giant bugs were coming out of all the drawers, closets, and anything else that could be opened. A gigantic centipede was floating in the air, it was about a foot long and several inches wide and the legs were all making a rippling movement. It was also making these jerky movements in the air and it didn't have wings, but it could fly. I was unbelievably horrified. Then, the big mamma jamma came along. I saw a spider with a giant, round, back half walking through the door. It was bigger than a large dog. I woke up from my dream, but I was still seeing it all. That's what makes it a night terror. You wake up and still see everything. Very scary. You don't have time to think logically and all you can assume is that it is actually happening, no matter how impossible it may seem.
The spider and all the other bugs were moving very slowly. The spider veered toward my sisters bed and I screamed to warn her. Myra woke up and had the most alarmed look on her face EVER to be had by anyone, before or since. I was pointing frantically and very animatedly at the giant spider like Chuck Barris pointing at JP Morgan on the gong show. I was yelling "Don't you SEE IT??? It's RIGHT THERE!! It's about to GET YOU!!!! AAAAAAAAUUUUUGGGHHH!!!! GIANT Spider!!! Open your eyes and LOOOOOOOOOKKKK!!!! It's right in front of you!!!
This makes me laugh to think about it now, because Myra was just stupendously horrified. She didn't know what the hell was going on. She had been awakened from a peaceful sleep and told that there was a giant spider that she couldn't see, just about to get her. She was all bunched up at the top of her bed, with her covers pulled all the way up to her eyeballs, trying, reeeeeeeeeally TRYING HARD to see this thing that was after her.
I still remember just how she looked. And boy, is it funny.
At some point, I just collapsed. I woke up in the morning, sitting up in bed. That was a wild experience. I have hallucinated spiders a couple of other times in my life, too. I tend to see big spiders when I have a high fever.
I'm a weird person, aren't I? Maybe everyone thinks they are weird and really we're all the same amount of weird?
Nah, I'm probably seriously weird.