Diaryland is broken so look in older entries to see the newer stuff

~~~~~~~New~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~Old~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~Profile~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~Notes~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~E-mail~~~~~~

2004-06-28 - 10:20 p.m.

It's time for a new entry. I think my nipples have been discussed enough.

Let's talk about my ass.

Just kidding. Perky though it may be... let's not go there.


Ladies and gentlemen, never trust anything that bleeds for a week and doesn't die. (Unfortunately, I fall into this dismal category.)

Don't trust me.


I had a very mixed kind of day. Some good things happened and some bad things. The whole day was colored by my painful biological situation and my need for Midol. And the overwhelming feeling that my whole life is crap. I know this is hormonal, because yesterday I felt great. Irrepressable, as it were. I'm usually happy and content. But PERIODically, I'm not my usual happy self.


I've had a hard time of it today. But here's what was good: I got in contact with one of my friends from high school. We talked in IMs today and that was fun. She sent me a bunch of pictures and she said I look the same as I did in high school. Poor girl can't see good. She has very handsome kids that look so much like her.

She gave me some very bad news. I had this very sweet friend in high school, named "Myron". He was one of my very most favorite school buddies and I never thought about the fact that he was gay. It was obvious, but I don't even know if I totally realized. I mean, I knew, but I just didn't EVER think about it when we were hanging out together. I was a weird kid I guess. Anyway, my friend told me Myron died last year of AIDS. That's very sad to me. I wish I had contacted him because he really was special to me. My family moved to Germany and it was just impossible for me to keep up with all my high school friends.

Chris also told me that one of my other friends, named Bobby, also was gay and died of AIDS. I had no idea he was gay. No clue. I'm surprised. He wanted me to be his girlfriend all through 10th grade. I let him tell his friends I was his girl because he was so sweet and I didn't want to hurt his feelings. I shoulda known! I used to wonder what would ever become of Bobby, but I never ever thought it would be early death from AIDS.

So that was a bummer. Finding out about 2 friend's deaths in one day. It's like they just died today to me. She also named off a third guy who died of AIDS that I don't remember at all. She said he was in our German class. I'm drawing a blank here.

She dated the shy and sweet younger brother of a guy I almost married. I pulled a no show at my own wedding. heh heh. I've never mentioned that on here, have I? I was young and stupid. I did not want to marry this guy. He was a body builder and had threatened every male friend I had and every guy he thought might try to ask me out (which in his mind was EVERYBODY). He had his good points, but he was just insanely jealous and he convinced me that I was responsible for his happiness. I bought into that because I was inexperienced. I felt very obligated to go through with this wedding. His family traveled from Colorado to Louisiana where my relatives lived and I was supposed to fly home from Germany to marry this shmuck. I had a melt down at the airport and my Daddy said I didn't have to go. I was catatonic for a couple of days and that was that.

His family traveled about 2200 miles to find out the deal was off. One of my aunt's actually thought I should go through with the wedding because her daughter was going to be the flower girl and she wanted to see her baby walk the aisle in her pretty dress. That's messed up.

It would have been a catastrophic marriage to say the very least. I was spared from that one... dodged THAT bullet, and then I smartly blundered my way into a bad marriage anyway! Go me! I guess that was just a struggle I needed to experience. I jes' had to have me a bad marriage.

I can check that off my list of things to do now.


I have another funny story about the baby. Today she came up to me and she stunk like a person who really should be potty trained by now. (she's resisting the process) I said "Hey kid, you stink." She struck a regal pose and said "Actually, Mimi, I smell like poo". haha. She put a lot of emphasis on the word "poo". She is a character.

Ebba Dee Ebba Dee Ebba Dee...That's all folks.

spring - fall

6 This comments thingy doesn't work now because I let my paid membership lapse.

Words to Live By - 2015-03-04

Sunshiney - 2015-02-10

New and Improved - 2015-01-30

The Deep - 2014-12-30

In Love - 2014-12-29

free hit counterWho links to me?
about me - read my profile! read other Diar
yLand diaries! recommend llama 

licking to a friend! Get
 your own fun + free diary at DiaryLand.com!