Here's some words to live by: Any time you can work a monkey into the conversation, do it. A monkey is always good. I have one more monkey related story to tell and then I might let go of my fixation and move on to something else, unless more monkey humor surfaces.
There are these 2 little girls I know and their grandmother is visiting them for the holidays. These little girls have a homemade CD with a bunch of R&B / mild rap type songs on it. Most of these are radio versions, so they aren't toooooo horrible, but their very proper grandma was appalled when she noticed some of the lyrics that are not bleeped out.
She was describing this shocking nastiness, and she got it all wrong in a really funny way. She was talking about the song "Yeah" by Usher, where Ludacris says "If you hold the head steady I'm gon milk the cow."
Grandma was trying to remember the lyrics and she said one of the songs was extra nasty because the guy said "Hold her down boys, I'm going to milk the monkey!"
That does sound pretty vulgar now that I think about it.