I LOVE MY BED
I loved it so very much before, but now, it brings a tear to the eye knowing just how fabulous it has become.
You see, my mother, good ole Ma, got me a tremendously wonderful down comforter to top off my bed, which has been something of a work in progress.
I started out with great mattresses on a regular bed frame. My mattresses are comfortable and of a high quality, without any help, but since I have a tendency to always be feathering my nest, I wanted something extra on it. So I got 2 foam egg crate mattress covers and a bedsack. And a whole lot of pillows. I have 2 body length, column-shaped pillows that sleep with me. One in front of me and one behind. They are twins.
Last Christmas I traded off my egg crates for a king size feather bed, crammed into a queen sized feather bed cover, for extra POOF, and voila! Comfy bed made bettah.
I thought it was perfect then.
I have a crazy fetish for fine linens, so I have a lot of high thread count sheets. I'm such a freak about sheets, that I can run my hand over a sheet and tell you how many threads are in each square inch of it. So I have the silkiest, finest sheets around on top of my fine and poofy feather bed.
But it wasn't perfect yet.
I like a tall bed. So I went to Bed, Bath, and Beyond, and got myself a set of bed boosters. You put one of these babies under each leg of your bed stand and it raises it up to a nice height. I installed these with the help of my 8 year old nephew. Who knew that kid could hold up a queen size bed all by himself. HA! I kid. Now I have to climb to get into my lofty perch.
Then I says AAAHHHHHH!!!!
But wait, more can be done! I was wishing I had a nice cushy down comforter to make it all perfect and I almost bought one for myself, but then I remembered that christmas shopping is supposed to be for OTHER PEOPLE so I stopped buying stuff for me (right after I got my new computer chair).
So now my bed is just a master piece of fabulous comfort. I didn't want to get up this morning.
Unlike his-holiness , I had absolutely no hot action, whatsoever. That is, none. I was Hot-Action Free, as it were. I got zero hot action. Otherwise known as Bupkus, nuffin, nada, zip. But you know... this may be a good thing, since I didn't want to share my bed any ole way. Except with pilla 1 and pilla 2 the body pilla twins.
I got a whole bunch of cool stuff from the people who buy me stuff. And I gave a whole lotta cool stuff to people I buy stuff for. One of my favorite things I got somebody was a leather jacket I got for Myra. I got a stupendous bargain on it. It's so mahvelous.
We had some fun making Elvis junior, the lesbian nephew wait and wait and WAIT to open some presents. He kept asking "Can we open presents now?" At one point I told him we were going to have dinner, then read the entire Bible, then "share stories" and then later, after that, if everyone wanted to, we MIGHT let him open one. ONE.
He visibly slumped.
Muahahahahaha! He was in a state of high anticipation.
The two year old got all kinds of cool toys. Big fabulous, expensive, elaborate, toys... and I gave her this little plastic dog that shoots bubbles out his mouth. Guess what she was obssessed with?? We tried hiding it after we noticed IT LEAKS when you lay it down, but every few minutes the baby would holler "I want my PUPPY!! Where's my PUPPY??"
I got the nephew a drum set. His dad shook his head and said "What were you THINKING?" I said "I was thinking this could go to YOUR PLACE." hahaha. Aren't I just hateful and yet precious? All at the same time??
Aaaaaaaaaanyways... despite owning the worlds' most comfortable bed, I didn't sleep well. At some point in the night I apparently wharfed up a cat while sleeping. Damn bronchitis. I got up and was soundly mocked by my sister, who also got no sleep. Then we were all up again approximately 6 minutes later when the chillins popped awake. I had several naps throughout the night and morning. I'm ok now, but I feel hungover, and I didn't drink. Not fair.
My bronchial tubes itch. This can't be right.
M E R R Y C H R I S T M A S ! ! !